Where Did He Pick THAT Up? – Part 3

BS”D

Wouldn’t you know it, right after I finished posting the last edition of “Where Did He Pick THAT Up?” I realized that there were a few other things that I could’ve written about.  I was so careful not to forget anything last time too.  I even planned ahead and made notes.  On the plus side though, it means that I have material for this time around, and you get to enjoy more of Tevye’s outlook on life.

A few weeks ago the kids and I were getting ready to go out for a walk.  We all sat on the floor and they were waiting for me to put their socks and shoes on. Since they both enjoy doing things for themselves, I handed both of them a pair of socks and told them to put them on.  At one point during our sock-capades, while everyone was struggling to get all of their toes into the the socks, I made some comment about how we were having a sock party.  As soon as everyone’s socks and shoes were on, Saarah pooped, and she stunk something fierce.  When I say she stunk, I mean that it was worse than a mehadrin bus in Jerusalem during the nine days(a mehadrin bus is one that generally only orthodox people will ride, and during the nine days there is a custom of not showering.  The nine days takes place in mid summer, and the fact that the people who generally use these buses wear clothing that isn’t designed for warm weather doesn’t help either.  I’m implying that it’s a very stinky situation).  I took Ms. Saarah to change her bum, and as I was getting her diaper off Tevye saunters on up, plunks himself down beside me and exclaims with a level of enthusiasm that only Tevye can muster “We’re having a poop party Tatte!”.  I was laughing so hard that I was doubled over and had to be careful not to get any closer to the Diaper-Of-Doom.

Another day, also while getting ready to go out, I was telling Saarah to go and get her white shoes.  Instead she brought her pink shoes.  As I’m trying to teach Saarah her colours, I was showing her the difference between white shoes and pink shoes.  I said it a few times, and suddenly it hit me that I sounded like Vince selling his “Slap Chop”.  At this point I started saying “White cheese, yellow cheese” and without any sort of prompting, coaching, or prior training, Tevye chimes in with “comes with a twister”.  Oh Tevye. Vince has to stop buying ad spots during news broadcasts.

While getting ready for a bath one night, Saarah was mostly undressed and decided that she wanted to run around.  She was only wearing her skirt at the time, and she started dancing and twirling around.  Tevye exclaimed very excitedly that Saarah was a ballerina.  Tevye’s not had any exposure to anything ballet-related, so I’m not sure where he learned the term.  Perhaps he saw something on Sesame Street.

The nice thing about Tevye saying these absurd statements is that it provides me with fun writing material.  And since he’s stopped pooping on the floor and in strange locations, I don’t have any poop stories anymore.  I’m sure that when it’s time for Saarah to start potty training I’ll have more.  Until then though, keep up the good work Tevye.

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